When kindergarten teachers ask about what they need to see for a well-prepared kindergartner, it’s not how many letters and numbers they know.

It’s how well do they conduct themselves in a classroom? Can they make friends? Resolve social conflict? Participate appropriately in a group setting? Can they follow directions and stay on task for teacher-directed activities? These are the basics for a good beginning to formal education.

The child that can’t control themselves socially, or feels socially isolated, or is disruptive, or can’t stay on task, isn’t set up to succeed educationally no matter how well they know the alphabet or their numbers.

Preparation for future classroom readiness with regards to social and emotional skills is most likely to occur in a classroom format. Enrolling your young child in a toddler group or preschool where appropriate classroom skills are being taught is probably your first step. There are many great programs to choose from.

To create interest and skill in literacy at home, the best thing is to consistently model reading and writing. Let them draw scribbles that look like writing whenever you have an excuse such as having them add “their words” to a letter to grandma. Even if they can’t write yet, if you have them mimic writing and then ask them what it says, they begin to absorb the idea that you can communicate through writing. Get them cutting with children’s scissors and drawing to build up hand-eye coordination and muscle tone in their hands for future writing.

Read to them and in front of them to model reading. Reading is the most powerful thing you can do. Read good stories that capture their imagination and create a desire in your child to learn to read themselves. Play letter games – “your name starts with a J. Let find ‘Js’ while we’re driving, on menus, etc.”

Make it fun, make it natural. Don’t force it on children at this age. A very young child who is forced to learn past their natural interest level learns to hate learning and shuts down. Life long learners love learning for it’s own sake. It’s an adventure, not a chore.

When do you worry about the kid who doesn’t like homework or writing? First grade is when study habits and work-ethic development needs to be modeled and enforced. Good study habits take a long time to develop, and parents need to set the stage for their children’s success by being tuned into their child’s homework and study expectations at school.

Parents also need to follow up to make sure that children are meeting those expectations on a regular basis. Assign times for your child to do their homework after school. Set up a place for them to work and make sure the TV is turned off. Don’t schedule too many extra curricular activities that sabotage their time/energy/focus from completing their school work. Be available to help, but don’t do it for them.

Karen Hergert is the owner and director of Morning Star School, Inc. in Kenmore and Woodinville. Call 425-486-9333, or visit www.morningstarschool.com.