What is the most important gift we can give our children? According to the book “How Children Succeed” by Paul Tough it is the gift of grit, curiosity, and the hidden power of character that helps kids succeed… And it can be taught.

I have been a parent and educator for 30 years, this has always been my belief system, too. It nurtures my passion and gives me purpose to work with children and parents every day.

Being a parent takes on many dimensions. On the face of it, parenthood is a huge investment of time, energy, and emotion. I believe the moment your child is born you will begin preparing them to leave you. What kind of character traits do you hope to instill in your children? It is so important to have a vision of long-term goals for all children. They are the joy of the present & our hope for the future.

There is something to be gained by helping children become capable people. We can do this by believing and having faith that all children, regardless of their appearance or background, are truly great people with great potential. There are so many benefits from nurturing them as they grow to become full-bodied people.

What is most important in children’s development is not stuffing as much cognitive information as possible into their brains, but helping them develop a very different set of non-cognitive skills of character building. These skills include being a problem solver, having persistence, self-control, curiosity, conscientiousness, grit (or resilience), and self confidence. When children learn these skills, it allows them to build a moral compass and integrity by being kind, respectful, empathetic, and grateful.

We instill these characteristics by teaching children how to think, not what to think. By doing this, children can then develop a sense of positive power, thus allowing them to believe: “I like myself. I can think for myself. And there is no problem so great that it can’t be solved.”

When adults strive to be continual learners and seekers of knowledge, we become passionate about our moral responsibility to our young children, the children who will one day be our leaders and caregivers of the world. My dreams that all children, in their own way, will be contributors to our communities and the world. I hope they all search for ways to give back, to live life not with fear or apprehension, but with gratitude and hope.

Life is a process! Be brave and remember all of your years and the hard work of parenting will result in something very special. This process of nurturing your children will be instrumental in them becoming responsible and kind adults.

Molly Carson is the executive director of Bucky Beaver Preschool in Kirkland. Contact her at (425) 821-5022.